I've heard that rioters will sometimes queue with us lowly individuals? Is this true? And if so how do you sign up? (First time on the forums :/)

Add RiotPenguin. He tends to queue with people.
Be advised though, he clears his friends list every week.
Don't know where the thread is so your best choices is just to search Riot Penguin on the forum search.

They will also play with you on your 1 k win if you ask them too on the forums.

THAT'S A FILTHY LIE!! Who told you that?? I'll teach you to -- *whisper whisper whisper* What? *whisper whisper* ...I did? *whisper* .....ah...

*ahem* So apparently I DID say that in this post:
http://na.leagueoflegends.com/board/....php?t=3054707

I have 3k wins, I have asked a Rioter to play with me at 1k, 2k, and 3k...

Still waiting :/

On a related note; Why is Valor not a penguin?