SUMMONERS! The time has come for YOU to exercise a very important right—nay, a civic duty that you must fulfill. That is right: I, Uncle Ryze, WANT YOU to VOTE. And tonight, the candidates for the suddenly vacated seat on Piltover’s Parks and Recreation Committee will present their viewpoints on the pressing issues directly affecting your mortal existence! As your debate moderator, it is my job to ensure order will be maintained within this stately Veterans’ Hall.
The question posed to our candidates tonight is…“Wards: Enlightening Vision of the Future, or Menace to Progress?” Shall we proceed with our opening statements?
- Leaning on her podium, Shyvana breathes heavily into her mic: “For far too long has the humanoid-draconic population been grossly underrepresented in our constituency. Wards are yet another deterrent to drive us away from nesting in our native bushes. It’s enough to make me rage…” 487 RP
- A polite cough cuts her diatribe short. Jayce adjusts his collar and interjects: “Excuse me, moderator. While my opponent makes some very scorching remarks, everyone knows that the future lies in scientific exploration. I find wards to be one of the greatest inventions of our modern era, keeping champions safe from future backstabbing with exceptional premonitions!” 487 RP
- With a thunderous slam onto the stage, Pantheon arises, dust rising from the crater left behind. He bellows: “While I do not approve of this…science…thing, I stand with him! Wards grant me the sight necessary to land my spear shots, and in doing so lend strength to my arm. I will shield-bash anyone who dare challenges me!” 487 RP
- Jaximus twirls his long-handled axe about his head as he hollers: “Those about to gank, I salute you! The best ward is the edge of your weapon—that’s light enough to reflect off the fear in your sneaky enemy’s eyes! You call yourself a gladiator? Wards are for the weak! Who’s with me?” 487 RP
- A clang resonates as the shard of Redeemed Riven’s gargantuan blade smacks the spear away. She collects herself, and softly intones: “Why must we war over wards? Is it not enough to acknowledge both their usefulness and their deadliness? I believe every champion has the right to decide and must ward responsibly.” 487 RP
In response, loud protestations break out from all the candidates. With water glasses knocked aside and weapons brandished, the champions glare menacingly at one another.
Stop! What’s this? Everyone! Order! I insist! We must maintain dignity—these are serious matters at hand! What do you think this is, the Proving Grounds?! ORDER!
- The room rapidly falls silent, but not due to Uncle Ryze’s protestations. A pop and surprised mew! echo through the room. A black kitten lands where Jax once stood, looking bewildered. Wicked Lulu skips up to the stage and climbs on top of her podium, giggling: “I represent the Pink Ward Party! Vision for all, all for vision, and easy free gold kills. And they’re cute, too!” 487 RP
Well, that was certainly an, ahem, lively debate. Excellent insights from both sides! Now that you’ve heard their arguments, be sure to cast your ballot for your chosen candidate from November 2 to November 5. Remember: vote early and vote often!