One of the best, most thorough discussions I've read in a long time.
OP, thanks for posting. The links you provided were great, too.
As a father of two gorgeous daughters, I have to limit their access to this community, my community, for many of these reasons. They are assaulted enough by TV, Billboards and even magazines at the checkout lines about what they are supposed to look like, do and behave towards males. I don't need their escapes from reality to attack their self image and self worth as well. Even though they are both beautiful, and they truly are, I want them to focus on what lies beneath - who they are, who they want to be and how they want to be to other people more than what they look like.
I personally got very lucky with their mother. She didn't know I was a geek when we started dating. It took her years to figure it out... I guess I hid it well. Honestly, lately, with the way our community has been shifting, I try to distance myself more from it than I did in the past.
These sorts of conversations make me a bit more confident that my girls can grow up and be little geeks without being *** objects. Many of the posters here make me worry, but, mostly, I think I see the tide shifting in their favor.