"Then how do you... you know...?"

"Right... nothing at all." Janine replied, approaching Shauna. "Umm... you start."

"...Orianna and Blitzcrank sittin' in a tree~." Sarah sang happily.

Sarah blinked, and approached Morgana.

"Would you ease up on the boy? Eesh." She said quietly.

It was a hypothesis. This is some sciencey **** goin on here. Yeah.

A letter would arrive for Sarah sometime later, signed by the Maven herself.

"Oh please." Sarah said, smirking. "What do you use, wet sand?"

Sarah quirked a brow. Sona plus rum equals happy Sarah Fortune.

No, I do NOT use sand when I-

I DON'T DO IT AT ALL!!!!

Blitzcrank flops onto the ground, now in a sitting position as Fortune taunts him. His optics look forlornly at the earth beneath him.

Morgana leans over and whispers in Sarah's ear, bringing her wing up to block it from Zachary.

"...Sarah, I need to ask you for a favor. He's becoming a full-fledged Summoner-up from an apprentice-in several months, and thus will no longer be under my employment. Considering how fantastic a job he's done in the past few months or so, I highly doubt I can find an adequate replacement...so I need to send him off in a spectacular way."

She pauses. Looking around, she begins speaking again.

"I need you to get him laid. I know it sounds bad, but honestly? For me to acknowledge that he deserves it, that means he really does."

The fallen angel gulps lightly.

"Now, you don't need to do it yourself, but your mate, Janine-she's not with anyone, right? Maybe they could start something, or at least get one of your higher-up crew members to take care of him. Really, at this point it's an act of mercy. He's never done it, if his memories are anything to go by, it's clearly affecting him negatively, and I'm definitely not touching him-don't ask me why, I'm just not."

She places a hand on her best friend's shoulder and sighs heavily.

"Sarah...please?"

"Ah ah~!" Sarah said. "What do you use~?"

"Aw, I'm sorry." Sarah said. "Need a... uh... couldn't possibly hug you... uh... wanna see my boobs?"

She smirked, offering only because it meant nothing to Blitzcrank.

Sarah blinked, staring at Morgana with a look of disbelief.

"Wow." She said, smirking. "I'll do my best, don't worry. Buuut... it'd mean the most if you'd do it, you know. It'd give him the most confidence from it."

"I know, but I can't. I...have my own reasons for not touching him."

She looks back over her shoulder. Zachary seems to have calmed down, though he's not looking over at them.

"...Please?"

On the contrary, Blitzcrank immediately stands up, optics scanning a particular area of Fortune before he begins speaking.

"-THE-INFLECTION-IN-THE-QUERY-REGARDING-EXPOSING-YOUR-MAMMARY-GLANDS-IMPLIES-SARCASM - - -IN-REALITY-SUCH-AN-ACT-POSSESSES-SIGNIFICANTLY-MORE-VALUE-THAN-FORTUNE-IMPLIED - - - GATHERING-DATA-FROM-AN-ACT-THAT-I-HAVE-NEVER-WITNESSED-OR-ENGAGED-IN-RESULTS-IN-SIGNIFICANT-POSITIVE-FEEDBACK - - -"

Yes, that was exactly what it sounded like. Before Fortune could respond, however, Blitzcrank continued.

"-WHAT-DO-YOU-SUGGEST-I-GIVE-TO-THE-MAVEN-AS-THANKS - - -AND-WHAT-IS-YOUR-SUGGESTION-REGARDING - - - "

He trails off, but the final word is obvious.