What is a man?

Someone who is as swift as a coursing river
With all the force of a great typhoon
With all the strength of a raging fire
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon!

In all seriousness though I think I would have to say someone who:
1. Accepts responsibility - Not only for their actions, but also who takes up an effort to do what needs to be done.
2. Rejects passivity - Someone who stands up for what they believe and does not sit by and let things happen.
3. Respects others - Shows respect to others regardless of what they believe, their gender, social status, etc.

You won't get an accurate answer asking here because with the exception of a couple people, there aren't any here.

Something about a wiener.

A man is an adult human that produces spermatozoa with which an ovum may be fertilized.

Me.

someone who can make fun of others on an online forum

An adult male human.

It's really sad that no one answered with

A miserable little pile of secrets