I joined a game and the chat goes like this:
Person A: Sorry if I'm slow guys, I had wrist surgery 3 days ago so I have to play 1 handed.
Person B: It's okay, Person C and I are drunk.
Person C: [something unintelligible]
Me: You know what? **** it. brb getting a beer.

I'm so happy I chose to not queue dodge, that game was awesome. Person A had a Razor mouse of some sort with macros, so it wasn't that bad.

Teammate Ezreal respawning, enemy team at baron (CV:ed by support). Ezreal "/all BARON STEAL" throws his ultimate, steals it, kills one and we push their nexus down after a close match

Playing as Gangplank (pre-suckage), I see tryndamere at 60% hp coming at me, one hits him with parrley and says "Be quick or be dead"

leprechaun veigar skin "Taste the rainbow *****" *scores kill with dark matter*

accidentally presses karthus ult after i killed someone.

"****, wasted my ult..."

their warwick died to dragon four seconds later

*Nidalee hits invisable twitch with spear*
LOUDLY over Vent Chat: TOUCHDOWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!

Morde player on my friend's team: I AM SUPERHERO MORDE

GARAGAS SUCK GUY

My team aces after I ult enemy team with Malphite: Looks like this team was hit by *sunglasses*..an unstoppable force. YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!