Originally Posted by Rueian
Its hard to do that during a game.
Sorry buddy for the late response my buddy needed a birthday dinner.
It is very hard to work on anger and frustration during the moment. One of the most irritating things to hear when you're really worked up is to be told that you have to calm down.
You probably wouldn't know it from my other Tribunal posts but I've actually spent jail time because of my own challenges with anger. (amazingly games don't anger me much so count one blessing) Having spent a few years in cognitive behavioral therapy I can tell you that I really feel your pain. It can feel as if these things are completely out of your control. Anger over time can turn minor circumstances in to burned bridges and in your current case could get you kicked out of the League.
Like in my previous post I suggest you focus on what you say. You can catch yourself if you spend time to think about it after the fact. Say you get really angry in a game and type some hurtful things. Afterwards you can write down what it is that makes you so angry. Imagine yourself writing down the following...
My team mates NEVER support me.
Is this really true? Probably not. You can probably think of some times when you've received amazing support.
From here you can say and think the more rational thought like "I'd really like it if my team mates supported me when it counts." Breaking down your thoughts like this over time can open you up to what you're really thinking about. Over time you'll unpackage a lot of the baggage you might have accidentally acquired about what MUST be. It also helps to understand that anger often stems from other emotions like being sad or afraid. You might find that you have a fear of a negative win to loss ratio. You could try to unpackage that and ask yourself why is that? Are you afraid of ridicule? Has some one done that to you before? In time you'll understand yourself better and live a life more in control with your goals lined up with your core beliefs instead of just your surface thoughts.
Also here's a few other things to remember.
1. You are your own man (or woman whichever it is!).
2. You allow yourself to be provoked. People who think otherwise are giving their control over to some one else. It's a way to avoid responsibility for what one does. When you understand that others don't actually control what you do you will understand that they can't provoke you.
3. Slow down. Spend more time considering your thoughts. Awareness of your thoughts is like a muscle that you exercise. In time you'll catch yourself before you say it. Before you snap you can catch yourself thinking "It's ALWAYS like this and if I don't do some thing about it now then it will NEVER change."