I shouldn't be alive right now. This is what happened.
My wife got a phone call yesterday from a common friend, who was concerned with a girl we know and her historically abusive husband. The common friend asked my wife is she would go check on them just to see if they were ok
My wife drove buy their house (less than half a block away from my house) and saw that they were home, and that they were arguing.
My wife asked if I would walk by his house and see if they were ok...rather I told my wife I didn't wnat her going alone, but since we have 3 kids one of which is 5 months old I set out alone.
when I got close to the house I could hear the yelling. But only him. When I got closer (I came from the back yard since they are connected to our back yard. I could hear the aweful things he was saying to her. "you stupid fat **** (shes 5"4 and 120 lbs. NOT fat in the slightest) "you worthless piece of trash *****! you are a ****ing lazy **** wife" and on and on, I sat listening for about 5 minutes when I heard her say (it was hard since she wasn't yelling) "please let me up, your hurting me, get off please!" she was crying.
Something inside of me sorta snapped. I'm not a violent person. We are both in the US Army, I am an infantryman, and he is a gunsmith. He is 6'7" and 280lbs. I am 6'2" and 180. I couldn't sit there and listen to him abuse his wife any longer.
I was going to knock, but I instantly got a bad case of tunnel vision. I busted through the back door and was absolutely enraged at what I saw
He had her down on the floor about 10 feet from the door. She had a bloody nose, which had stop bleeding, he had her hands under his knees, and was using his weight to hold her down. Her hands were turning blue. He was using his free hand to hold her head hard against the floor. and with the other hand he was "allowing" her to speak, when he wanted her to shut up he would push on her throat, or jaw or whatever to keep her from talking.
When I came through the door I told him to get his ass of his wife, I pushed him away rather hard, but not hard enough to hurt him. I helped her up and told her to get the baby and to go over to my house.
John, the abuser told her that she could go, but the baby was staying. I stood between him and her and refused to let him get past me. I told him to shut up and sit down, he was done talking and I was going to tell him when he could talk. I told him how big a **** hole he is and that I've never ever seen any man treat his wife in such a horrible manner, he tried to tell me how bad a wife she is, but I cut him off telling him that I do not care what she did or didnt do there is never any reason for a man to act like he was.
I was so mad I was shaking. I told him that the baby and his wife were leaving and he had no say in what was going on.
when she got the baby, and left I wait a few seconds to make sure he didn't go after her and I left.
To make a long story short he is now being held by our station MPs. I work directly for the command sergeant major of the post and called him to let him know what was going on.
His wife is now staying at my house until things get worked out or whatever.
When the MPs got to him, they found on him a loaded glock with a fully auto fuction he put together. 11 other firearms in the house, and close to 30 knives.
I've never been that kind of guy. Usually quiet, and somewhat shy. Bullied a lot as a kid. As I look back on what I did, it really scares me that I actually walked into this giants house and pushed him around while he was armed to the teeth and has had a history of violent behavior. However I wouldn't do any different were I faced with the choice again.
Has anyone had experience with spouse abuse in the military?
One final thought:
I don't care who you are, what she/he did. If you are abusing your spouse SOMEBODY knows exactly what is going on. Its not something you can keep secret. You are trash and not worth the air you breath. Everyone sees through your pathetic public face.
if you know of someone abusing their spouse or children do something. If this skinny shy guy can stand up to a armed giant, you can do something too.
If you are getting abused NOTHING your abuser says is true. You have control, YOU have the options, YOU have nothing to risk by leaving and getting help. If you don't know where to go, calling 911 is perfectly acceptable. Society and the world is on your side. Screw that trash abuser he/she is nothing without you. Please get help.
Its long, but I had to get this out of my system. Facebook isn't the right place for it either.