Part 2 has been released, go read it now!
“Wow, this is great! I got buffed and now practically everyone buys me! I feel so popular!”
“Yeah, enjoy it kid. You’ve got one patch until they nerf you, maybe two if you’re lucky.”
“Aw man, really?”
“Yeah, it was two patches until they nerfed me. Warmog’s as well. Seems to be a lot of people complaining about you though, you may not be so lucky”.
“Jeez, that kinda sucks. Maybe it won’t be so bad, I mean the only reason everyone’s using me is cos health is so popular, maybe after a week or so people will learn to buy Randuin’s 
more and then I’ll--“
“LOL they just hotfixed you”
“What?!”
“LOL omg that was fast, you didn’t even last a week!”
“Talk about your fifteen minutes of fame huh? It’s alright kid, I didn’t last that long either. People complained about me for so long, they nerfed me even further even while all the pros were spamming Locket of the Iron Solari 
and Runic Bulwark 
in tournaments.”
*sniff* “It’s okay, I trust Xypherous, he works hard. I’m sure if we get overnerfed he’ll re-tune us so that we can still be viable.”
---Meanwhile at Riot HQ---
“F*** IT THIS IS TOO HARD, FIRST BC THEN WARMOGS NOW BOTRK, I’LL JUST RE-BUFF AND RE-RELEASE EVERY SINGLE ITEM TO WHEN THEY WERE STUPIDLY OP”
---Next Patch---
“Hey guys look, they reverted my nerf! I guess they changed their minds, huh?”
“Never mind you, look at me! They reverted my nerfs too, my flat armor penetration isn’t even unique anymore!”
“Omg jealouuuuuuus, they reverted my nerfs too, and since everyone’s gonna be stacking you again I guess I’ll be more popular than ever! But seriously, what is Riot thinking? I mean, your passive is non-unique now? What gives?”
“Lord almighty, what happened here?! There’s burnt pieces of flesh and blood everywhere, what a massacre! What unholy force could have done this?”
“Oh dear god in heaven. Guys, look over there.”
“DEMACIAAAAAAAAAAA‼‼!”
“Good grief! Why is Garen stacking all those Sunfire Capes? How terribly inefficient!”
“Oh, right. You weren’t here to see this before, kid. Sunfire Cape used to have a non-unique passive, so champions like Garen could stack it to become unkillable while doing tons of damage. And you thought Warmog’s was bad.”
“Whoa, that’s pretty crazy. But that’s fine cos I was designed to counter high health! You and I just have to work together with Last Whisper 
, we’ll take these guys down in no time--“
*dodge* *dodge**dodge**dodge**dodge**dodge* *dodge*
“WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL IS THIS BLACK MAGIC”
“Oh yeah, there used to be this thing called ‘Dodge’ in the game. Phantom Dancer was pretty insane back then. Don’t even get me started on pre-nerf Jax stacking Phantom Dancers, that crazy mother could dodge the fountain laser.”
“Step aside honey buns, let the REAL health counter do its work.”
“Deathfire Grasp? What do you mean the REAL health counter? Your active deals the same amount of damage as mine!”
“That’s the nerfed me. The old me dealt 25% of your current health + 4% per 100 AP. Evelynn 
could build AP and two-shot squishies LOL.
“Pfft, amateur.”
“Who the hell are you?”
“Don’t you recognize me? I’m you, pre-pre-nerf DFG. When a champion deals spell damage I immediately deal 10% of your current health in damage, and that’s not even reduced for DoTs. You think Teemo’s 
OP with Liandry’s Torment 
? Think again.”
“Come here for a second”
“You have slain an enemy”
“WHAT IS HAPPENIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGGGG”
“Oh my god! They killed Warmog’s!”
“You bastards!”
“Something is seriously wrong with League of Legends. It’s like they’ve reverted every single nerf for every god forsaken OP item ever released in this game!”
“Good heavens, that Vlad 
stacking Hextech Revolvers 
just healed back to full from one minion wave!”
“Hey, is that…? No way…”
*gasp* "COULD IT BE?”
“Hey there sexy, looking for a good time?”
“COME HERE MY PRECIOUS”
“LOL JOKES" *removes Innervating Locket*
“Fak u Moarjello”
“****, that Jax from before is stacking Hextech Gunblades 
now. The horror.”
“Good grief, Heart of Gold 
is back! With armor and non-unique Gp10 and everything!”
“Whatup dawg”
“What the hell are you?”
“I’m Rabadon’s mother-lovin’ Deathcap 
and Zhonya’s sexy-as Hourglass figure 
in one magnificent package, fool.”
“<3”
“Who ever thought this was a good idea?”
“Oh hey look, those items got their nerfs reverted too…”
---Meanwhile at Riot HQ---
“Xypherous you fool! You reverted the nerfs on Trinity Force 
and Wit’s End 
?! Do you realize what you’ve done? YOU’VE BUFFED IRELIA! 
HOLD STILL WHILE I SMITE 
THEE!”
“DON’T TOUCH XYPH MORELLO HE BUFFED MY TRINITY FORCE, TONS OF DAMAGE‼!”
“ARGHHH RIVEN ORIANNA RENEKTON LULU 
BY YOUR OP POWERS COMBINED I AM CAPTAIN PLANET” 
“YARGHHHHHHHHHHHH”
---
“Hai guise great to be back - wow what the hell happened here?”
>>>Mini Update: Xin & Teemo<<<
Yaaaay 2000 upvotes, I love you guise.
Keep this bumped and upvote!
??
Senior Member
